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The
Women Who Refuse to Be Exchanged:
Nuns in Zangskar, Northwest India*
By Kim Gutschow
Why
exchange women? Because they are scarce [commodities]...
essential to the life of the group the anthropologist
tells us...
Luce Irigaray on Levi-Strauss
While
Buddhist doctrine proclaims phenomenal reality to be empty of absolute
or independent existence, in practice both gender and sexuality
appear to be inescapable and absolute conditions of the monastic
existence. Buddhist nuns may renounce the act of sex and desire,
but they cannot transcend the sex/gender system which constrains
their monastic vocation. Nuns can no more escape the eternal dialectic
of desire between the sexes than they can flee the mundane gender
roles that enmesh them. Even those intrepid nuns who successfully
maintain the celibate life remain complicit with one central premise
of the sex/gender system: the exchange of women. While daughters
are exchanged in marriage, nuns are traded for merit. Surprisingly,
monks regulate this "traffic" in women for they reserve the right
to control the admission, confession, and absolution of nuns.
These
privileges date back to the founding of the nuns' order, when the
Buddha apparently gave the monks considerable control over nuns.
For
Buddhist nuns, domestication has been achieved at the expense of
liberation. In the Tibetan Buddhist regions of the Northwest Indian
Himalaya, the narrow path to female celibacy is strewn with obstacles
through which only the hardiest souls may persevere. At every step,
nuns are engaged in everyday forms of resistance as they attempt
to evade the demands and desires made by their families, acquaintances,
and monastic brethren for assistance or succor. Even as their shorn
heads and sexless maroon robes signal a lofty intent to renounce
the worldly life, nuns remain tied to sex and gender roles in ways
that monks are not. Nuns are expected to toil selflessly in the
gardens, fields, and kitchens of both village and monastery, while
forgoing their own meditations. Their roles as dutiful daughters
constrains their efforts at becoming sacrosanct celibates, while
ensuring the agrarian prosperity essential to both household and
monastic economies.
Classical
Buddhist injunctions against renunciates working in the fields are
ignored by both villagers and monks, who eagerly recruit nuns prized
for their altruism. In theory, compassion is supposed to be applied
universally; in practice, it may be exacted along lines dictated
by custom and kinship.
THE LAW OF THE BUDDHA AND THE DOMESTICATION OF THE NUN'S ORDER
The
Buddha's initial ambivalence over the nun's order was not based
on women's lack of spiritual qualification but on a perceived threat
to the male monastic order. Legend has it that the Buddha only established
the nun's order after being accosted by his aunt, Mahapajapati,
and his closest disciple, Ananda. After considerable hesitation,
he relented but warned that the entry of women into the order was
as dangerous as mildew on a rice crop or rust on a sugar cane field.
Furthermore, the Buddha only allowed women to ordain on one condition:
that they henceforth adopt the so-called Eight Special Rules (Gurudhamma).
These rules specify that nuns may never censure or admonish monks,
that the most senior nun must respectfully prostrate before a freshly
ordained monk who may be decades her junior, and that nuns must
take their ordinations, bi-monthly confessions, rainy season retreats,
and penances in the presence of monks. While these baneful rules
may never have been spoken by the Buddha as some scholars claim,
they positioned the nun's order as subordinate to the monk's order
from the start.
The cumulative effect of these rules was to guarantee that monks
retained authority and preeminence over nuns. Centuries of regularized
repetition of subservience led the nunneries to become economically
and spiritually dependent on monasteries. Accordingly, nunneries
never gained as much patronage and political power as monasteries
did. Over time, this marginality may have led to the demise of the
nuns' order. By the 11th century, women could no longer seek full
ordination in much of South and Southeast Asia, while only novice
ordination was transmitted to Tibet. In the Tibetan Buddhist realm,
nunneries received far less endowment in land, livestock, and material
wealth than monasteries. As a result of this economic marginality,
nuns in the Buddhist Himalaya still work on their relatives' farms
in exchange for their daily bread, while monks are fed liberally
from the collective monastic resources. Additionally, nuns were
often not allowed to teach or transmit esoteric practices and knowledges.
Thus, female students were forced to supplicate themselves before
male teachers, a posture which has grave potential for abuse. Nuns
were domesticated to the male monastic realm, where they performed
menial tasks for monks just as a wife might for her husband. Although
such tasks are strictly forbidden by the monastic discipline or
Vinaya, I have seen and helped nuns wash and sew clothes, collect
dung and firewood, weed and water fields, roast barley, bake breads,
and perform countless other chores for monks in the Tibetan Buddhist
region of Zangskar to which we now turn.
This essay shall focus on the nun's life in Zangskar, a region slightly
smaller than Sikkim which lies tucked among the folds of a Greater
Himalayan range, in the Indian state of Jammu & Kashmir. Three staple
crops barley, peas, and wheat along with large herds of yak, cows,
goats and sheep guarantee most houses self-sufficiency in basic
foodstuffs. This livelihood is essential as the region is cut off
from vehicular traffic for at least seven months each year due to
heavy snows. Marriage and inheritance patterns are changing rapidly,
although vestiges of polyandry and polygyny remain. Until recently,
marriage and residence patterns were flexibly oriented towards a
single goal: keeping household land holdings intact. A melange of
patrilocal and matrilocal monogamy and polygamy contributed to an
economy where household fortunes might rise and fall, yet land holdings
remained fairly stable over generations. Primogeniture was customary.
The oldest son inherited the house and fields, while younger sons
often joined their brother's marriage. Alternatively, these younger
brothers became monks, homesteaders settling new lands, or husbands
at homes with no sons. Daughters married out but could inherit their
father's estate in the absence of sons. Zangskari households remain
linked by the exchange of women. Bridewealth payments still consist
of silver dollars left over from the Raj, cash, and livestock, while
brides are given substantial dowries to take to their new homes.
Conspicuous wedding feasts and extended marital negotiations lasting
over half a decade maintain the symbolic capital of Zangskari culture:
generosity, reciprocity, and hospitality.
Zangskar, where 95% of the population practice a local variant of
Tibetan Buddhism, has an extraordinarily high incidence of nunneries.
While the absolute number of monasteries and nunneries is roughly
equal, the ratio of nuns to monks (2:5) is far higher than in neighboring
areas of Tibet and Ladakh. It may constitute the highest such ratio
in the Indo-Tibetan realm. While most nuns and monks in Zangskar
are monastic celibates in the Gelugpa and Drugpa Kagyud orders,
some of the members of the latter order are married meditators (sgrub
pa) practicing Tantra. This essay examines one of Zangskar's largest
nunneries, which supports 20 novice nuns (dge tshul ma), who come
mostly from the village of Karsha (population: 440) and other nearby
villages in the region's Mandala shaped central valley.
THE
NARROW PATH TO NUNHOOD
The
path to religious renunciation is long and tortuous in both life
and literature. These two categories may even merge when a narrative
staged as a drama becomes ground for embodied experience. When the
famous Tibetan folktale of Nangsa bum was performed during the course
of the annual Gustor (dgu gtor) Festival in Karsha one year, the
play became a participatory performance and identifying narrative
for local actresses. Several weeks before the performance, members
of the all-female cast appeared to take up the play as an allegory
for the difficult choice between the religious and the married life.
At rehearsal parties which lasted far into the night, the young
actresses confided their own deepest fears of marriage and dashed
dreams for the celibate life. Palkyid admitted that as an oldest
daughter, she was destined to marry; thereby destined for joy in
this life but suffering in the next. Kesang said she had wanted
to join the nunnery rather than be sent off as a slave to an unknown
husband, but had cared for her sick and aging parents instead of
studying religion (chos). Lobsang recounted that when she divorced
her husband after just a week of marriage, she had tried to become
a nun but had been unable to master the archaic scriptures. While
other actresses had not sought out the celibate life, most identified
with the play, a Tibetan Bildungsroman of a woman who seeks to renounce
worldly life in spite of nearly insurmountable obstacles.
NANGSA
BUM: THE GIRL WHO WOULD RENOUNCE
Once
upon a time in a Tibetan village there lived an elderly couple who
were devoted Buddhists. Though they were very aged, one night the
wife had a vision of Tara in her sleep. Indeed, nine months later
she gave birth to a daughter whom they named Nangsa bum. When Nangsa
grew into a beautiful maiden, suitors came from many lands but her
parents refused them all, saying she wanted to become a nun. One
year when she went to religious festival, the lord of Rinag saw
her and decided she must marry his son. When he called her over
to propose, she protested that she was not fit to be a nobleman's
wife. The arrogant lord persisted, placed a turquoise on her head,
and declared that he would kill any other man who dared marry her.
The next day the lord appeared at her parents' doorstep, announcing
that he had come to make the bridewealth payments. When he left,
Nangsa wailed that she would rather meditate until she died than
marry. Her parents replied that the lord might kill them all. In
the end, Nangsa was married and a bore a son after a year.
Nangsa was terribly unhappy at her husband's palace, where her sister-in-law,
an unmarried and perhaps sexually frustrated spinster, never gave
Nangsa keys to the storeroom and generally made life difficult.
One day, two religious mendicants came to visit the palace while
Nangsa was in the fields harvesting barley. Because she had no access
to the storeroom, Nangsa could only offer them grain straight from
the fields. The jealous sister-in-law struck Nangsa for her insolent
and impromptu generosity and complained to her brother. Nangsa's
husband then beat his wife, breaking three of her ribs. Nangsa vore
her pain in silent resignation. Shortly thereafter, another religious
mendicant (her future teacher, in disguise) came to the palace.
When he sang a parable about the suffering that beautiful women
experience, Nangsa was deeply moved and, for lack of anything else
to offer, gave him the jewels from her breast. The lord, who had
been listening at the door, entered the room in a fury. The beggar
leaped out the window, but the lord beat Nangsa senseless, inadvertently
killing her. When the lord called in an astrologer, he warned them
not to burn Nangsa's body, because she would come back from the
dead in seven days' time. As foretold, she came back to life a week
later, declaring her intention to take up the celibate life.
When Nangsa's in-laws pleaded and her son begged her not to abandon
him, she relented. Still miserable, she went to visit her parents
and told them of her wish to become a nun. Her mother told Nangsa
how ridiculous she was to ignore her husband and his fine palace,
while yearning for celibacy. After feuding with her mother, Nangsa
ran off to the mountains to search for her teacher. Wandering for
days, she found his hermitage where she requested religious instruction.
The teacher flatly refused and said she was not ready. In response,
she pulled a knife from under her skirt, threatening to plunge it
into her breast. He relented and initiated her into Tantric practices.
Eventually, Nangsa's husband came to recapture her with an army.
Killing many meditators, the soldiers captured her teacher and insulted
him:
You
are an old dog that has seduced our snow lion!...
Why did you try to rape this white grouse?...
Why did you pull out her feathers and wings?
You are an old donkey living in a dirty stable.
Why did you rape our beautiful wild horse?
Why did you cut off her mane?
You nasty old bull, why did you have sex
with our beautiful white female yak?...
The
Tantric master reached out, moved the mountains, and brought his
dead disciples back to life. In response to their taunts Nangsa
levitated, mocking their attempts to tame her or own her. When the
soldiers saw her flying above them, they dropped their arms, and
all were converted to the religious life, including her husband
and the vicious sister-in-law.
Even
as a miraculous practitioner, Nangsa is traded like a commodity
between men. After her parents give her away to a pestering suitor,
she is pursued to the hermitage by the Rinag clan like an animal
who has gone astray. She represents an object of exchange which
has been seduced and defiled by the Tantric teacher. Because Nangsa's
true nature is wild, she protests their attempts to domesticate
her. Nangsa can pierce through the delusions of the Rinag clan,
yet such a success is far less likely for nuns in Zangskar. The
contradictions between intense spiritual ambition and social constraints
overwhelm many women who set out to be nuns. The themes of Nangsa's
storydomestic abuse, harsh in-laws, jealous spinsters, and
the urge to flee the worldly lifeboth draw and derail Zangskari
woman in their quest for celibacy.
THE
STRUGGLE FOR CELIBACY IN ZANGSKAR
Attaining
and maintaining celibacy is a long and difficult battle with one's
own family as much as one's conscience. While some girls are chosen
by their parents as future nuns, others must fight to leave home
and clandestinely join a nunnery. The words of a charismatic teacher,
a propensity for religious study or devotion, and childhood hardship
or abuse all may influence the choice to take up celibacy. The only
women who almost never become nuns are oldest daughters destined
for marriage. While there is no single factor that determines monastic
celibacy in Zangskar, a few patterns emerge. Some nuns are illegitimate
children or partial orphans and many have lived away from home during
their childhood. They may have learned the self-abnegation, stoicism,
and self-restraint which are essential to the celibate life. Yet
for every orphaned or illegitimate girl who arrives at the nunnery,
there are many others who do not choose the nun's life.
Palmo is a nun who has told me of her unlucky childhood as an illegitimate
daughter. Her mother's informal liaisons with two married men caused
Palmo much suffering. Since her mother was only a mistress but never
a wife, Palmo was forcibly separated from her mother sent to live
with her father at the age of four. When Palmo's father was forced
to marry his older brother's widow after the brother's death, he
dumped his mistress, Palmo's mother, and took Palmo with him to
his new home in Karsha. Palmo was an outsider twice over in her
stepmother's house. Her father was a second husband who would never
fill his older brother's shoes and Palmo was a sign of his past
indiscretions with another woman. As a husband who lived matrilocally
in his wife's house, he had no permanent inheritance rights. For
her stepmother, Palmo represented her father's promiscuous past;
now he was a beleaguered and hen-pecked husband as well. Palmo was
treated worse than a servant girl: she ate last from the left-over
scraps which others had neglected.
Palmo lost count of how many times she ran away to her mother's
village, only to be discovered by her enraged father, who beat her
soundly and took her back to Karsha. Her father's abuse may have
stemmed from the rage he felt as a powerless husband in a house
he would never call his own. With no prospects for a properly arranged
marriage, Palmo vowed to become a nun and never wind up a spurned
mistress like her mother. After having her head shaved and memorizing
the required texts, Palmo begged her father to allow her to join
the nunnery. Her father and stepmother stalled until Palmo threatened
to kill herself if they did not allow her to join the assembly of
nuns. Although her father and stepmother relented, they soon forgot
their promise. When Palmo remained adamant, her father took her
to the nunnery and petitioned the male abbot that she be admitted
to the nun's assembly. Palmo's father and stepmother never built
her a cell, and still scold her when she is absent from household
duties while attending ritual services.
An elderly nun, Deskyid, told me how she grew up as the second of
six children in a poor household. Because her parents couldn't afford
to feed all their children, they sent her away to live with two
of her father's sister, who were both married to the same man and
childless to boot. Deskyid's aunts treated her terribly, perhaps
because they too were victims of abuse at the hands of a husband
who mocked them for their sterility. She recalls not being allowed
to finish a single cup of tea without getting up for nine different
chores. She had no shoes, hardly any clothes, never enough to eat,
and often slept without a blanket. Her sadistic aunt once cracked
her ankle with the fire prongs, cutting her to the bone, while her
uncle once beat her unconscious. She still bears the traces of a
childhood marred by misery and abuse.
The first time Deskyid tried to run away, she was thrashed to within
an inch of her life. Her aunt told Deskyid she would drown her slowly
in the river by dipping her in and out. Deskyid was so frightened
that she didn't run away again until she was 19 years old. During
her second attempt, she was caught by two men on the open desert
plain just outside her aunt's village. On her third attempt a year
later, she forded the river on horseback with a young man whom she
says saved her life. When she reached her parents' house, she vowed
never to return to her aunts' house. She began to memorize religious
texts with her brother, a monk, and begged to have her head shaven.
Her family replied that she was too old to learn all the required
texts. Yet her diligence impressed an elder nun who took her on
as a student and some years later she took a seat at the nunnery.
Drolma was sent to take car of her sister's children in a distant
village. Until she returned home at age 16 when her wedding negotiations
got underway, Drolma studied religious texts with her friend Chosnyid
at the home of a neighboring doctor (am chi). When a learned monk
(dge bshes) from Ladakh came to give the precious Kalachakra teachings
in Zangskar one year, Drolma and Chosnyid went to be initiated.
Dressed in their finest silk brocade vests, tie-dyed shawls, and
jewelry, the two maidens were oblivious to the stares of young men
and older folks who whispered about Chosnyid's imminent wedding.
When the monk finished his sermon, they were so overwhelmed that
they decided to take up the religious life as soon as possible.
Explaining her motivations for renunciation on the next day, Drolma
told the monk: "To be enmeshed in delusion is nothing but endless
suffering. When the lama shaves my head, he cut the ties of worldly
sorrow..." After Drolma returned home with a shorn head, her parents
began to cry because she was their youngest daughter. Yet Drolma
has seen how unhappy two of her sisters are in their marriages with
abusive husbands. She has followed her sister to the nunnery, where
they enjoy quiet evenings reading scripture rather than cooking
for ungrateful men.
Chosnyid had far greater difficulties, for she was an oldest daughter
who flagrantly disobeyed both her parents and society. When she
did return home after the teachings, her father came looking for
her. When he saw her shorn head and her neck bereft of jewelry,
he was livid with rage. He yelled that he had drunk the asking beer
of her engagement over the last five years and that it was too late
to turn back the wedding. Thrashing her soundly, he tied her onto
the horse in front of him like a child and took her home. Although
he hastened to conclude the marriage negotiations, his daughter
outwitted him and fled back to the nunnery. Again, her father came
to fetch and berate her. For a year, Chosnyid and her father were
engaged in this tedious game of hide and seek until she could bear
it no longer. When the snows melted, she fled over the passes to
Ladakh and went to Dharamsala, where she settled in a hermitage
near the Dalai Lama's exile residence. She has never returned to
Zangskar although 25 years have passed.
Both parents and monks, in theory, acquire a good deal of merit
by dedicating a young girl to the celibate life. Officially, monks
manage a woman's passage into celibacy and the monastic order. In
Zangskar, only fully ordained monks can officiate the first tonsure
ceremony which signals the initial commitment to celibacy and the
ordination ceremony when a nun formally joins the monastic order.
The officiating monk must be sufficiently pure and ritually advanced
in order to transform the latent and manifest symbolic content of
these rituals. Hair is a potent symbol of sexuality; its removal
signifies a rejection of femininity and fertility. Since long and
glossy braids are a woman's pride and worth, their absence may be
mourned inwardly. The ceremonial braiding of a bride's hair is performed
by her closest age mates who celebrate an intimate jouissance in
the pre-dawn quiet of her wedding day. The ritual offering of hair
during the tonsure rite and the abandonment of feminine dress during
the ordination rite express a symbolic exchange in which forgone
sexuality is traded for future merit.
CELIBACY
AND ITS DISCONTENTS
Celibacy
is deemed essential to the monastic role in the Gelugpa sect and
it is literally defined as purity or perfection (gtsang ma, tshangs
ma) in Tibetan idiom. When I asked nuns how difficult it was to
maintain celibacy, they equivocated or laughed. By the time a nun
joins the nunnery, she may have been celibate for years or have
undergone significant hardships. While most nuns confessed to having
no carnal knowledge from their youth, some laypeople differed on
this point. Zangskari laypeople generally treat nuns with great
respect and rarely recite the Tibetan folktales about Aku Tonpa
and Drugpa Kunley filled with bawdy references to sexually frustrated
nuns. In Tibetan, there are more words for abandoning celibacy (mi
tshang par spyod pa, log g.yem, 'khrig pa, grong pa'i chos) than
for maintaining celibacy.
While many women have asked me if there are lesbian relations at
the nunnery, I never saw or even heard evidence of this. Locals
may quip about the homosexual activity in monasteries, however,
they demur when asked about nunneries. How do nuns sublimate their
sexuality? Perhaps a degree of physical proximity and the lifelong
companionship of nuns substitutes for sexual intimacy. Since most
nuns are engaged in higher Tantric meditations intended to subdue
the passions of the body, they follow well established methods of
sublimation. Even so, a younger nun once quipped, "If you bring
us a few husbands the next time you come from America, will they
follow obediently or will you put rings through their noses like
we do with our calves?" Many of the nuns I interviewed were pleased
to be single because they had a chance to pursue their religious
studies. Some recited a common proverb:
Everything
by your own will is blessed happiness,
Everything by another's will is suffering...
(Rang dbang thams cad dge ba yin
Gzhan dbang thams cad sdug bsngal yin.)
In my observations, lapses from celibacy usually occurred while
outside Zangskar on pilgrimage and resulted in immediate disrobal
for nuns although not always for monks. Monks seem to get away with
an occasional village tryst, given that one witness must be present
for the charge of sexual misconduct to be made. I have heard of
monks protesting their innocence years after most of the village
is sure of their guilt. In contrast, women bear an undeniable marker
of their indiscretions: pregnancy. Nuns and monks who lose their
celibacy are rarely ostracized by villagers, although they are punished
by their respective orders. Rather than shame, families express
a deep sadness over the lost Karmic potential for a defrocked monk
or nun can never join a Tibetan order again in this lifetime. I
have seen mothers weep decades after their child's disrobal, when
the son in question was married and had two children.
Although there are as many defrocked monks as nuns, nuns usually
are blamed for the lapse of celibacy. With folktales extolling women's
dangerous and insatiable desire, many villagers are not surprised
when a young woman takes a 'wrong turn' before reaching the nunnery.
To be and become a nun involves subtle but continuous resistance
to the domestic demands and physical desires of those who claim
a share of a nun's time or her body. Nuns may renounce sex, but
remain vulnerable to unwanted advances. Long after they take vows
of celibacy and homelessness, they may be called back into productive
and procreative roles.
Yangdrol explains how she was seduced back to the mundane village
realm. After she joined the nunnery, her father became severely
bedridden and so she began to live with her parents in the village.
Although Yangdrol had become a nun in hopes of getting on in life
and escaping domestic servitude, it seemed her destiny was to grow
old and single in her parents' house. Her neighbor, who had been
observing her from afar as she went to fetch water each day, eventually
propositioned her. When he asked if she wanted to join him on a
pilgrimage to attend the Dalai Lama's teachings in Sarnath, she
jumped at the chance. Although her mother and her friends warned
her about the neighbor's lecherous ways, she had higher dreams.
After the pilgrimage, she returned pregnant and has since had two
more children by the same man, who bears no responsibility for their
children.
WHY
ARE THERE RELATIVELY FEW NUNS?
The
decision to give up a child to the nunnery is rarely an issue of
having less mouth to feed, although this may be a contributing factor.
If the motivation for celibacy was purely economic, one would expect
to find a far greater percentage of nuns and monks in Zangskari
society. The paucity of nuns suggests that daughters may be too
valuable to be 'given away' to the nunnery, despite a promise of
increased merit. To treat the monastic vocation as an economic solution
to the problem of feeding one's children is to reduce social actors
to a Parsonian rationality which neglects affective and irrational
aspects of human nature and fortune. Many Zangskari parents cry
when a daughter leaves home for the nunnery because they are 'losing'
a child, even while 'gaining' merit. Mothers bemoan the loss companionship
which they would daughters who have forgone motherhood. Sending
a daughter to an institutional affiliation aimed at erasing the
affective and social bonds with the family is difficult for many.
There are not only psychological costs, but also material costs
to sending a daughter to the nunnery. If a family cannot afford
to feed its children, it may be cheaper to send a daughter to a
relative or keep her home as a spinster than to send her to a nunnery
. After joining the nunnery, a nun may ask her family to provide
the labor and materials to build her cell. She will also call upon
her parents and relatives to sponsor numerous rituals for which
she is nominated steward. However, while her parents lose some of
her labor as she begins to live at the nunnery, parents do not lose
a daughter to the nunnery in the same way that they lose a son to
the monastery. The relatively high ratio of nuns noted earlier may
be related to the fact that female monasticism provides a unique
source of adult labor power in Zangskar. Because they seek their
daily bread from home rather than their monastic institution, nuns
remain at the mercy of their relatives who call them for work on
the farm. Yet renunciation superimposes a web of chores owed to
the monastic collective. Many nuns find themselves in a double bind,
with duties to their fictive kin at the nunnery as well as their
real kin in the village.
Only rare and intrepid souls dare undertake a journey to lifelong
celibacy, which demands considerable perseverance. A nun does not
land in her position by accident because her parents couldn't afford
a wedding. Nuns are not the ugly ducklings who failed to find husbands
by the middle age; such women remain spinsters and rarely master
the classical Tibetan required for the monastic profession. Many
Zangskari women agree that the nun's life is the most difficult
to attain, but the most rewarding in the end. Yet these Zangskari
women speak less of making their own life choices and more of responding
to a destiny they call Karma. Older women see their situation as
largely determined by birth order, household wealth, and status.
While a handful of younger Zangskari women have become nurses, teachers,
and medical orderlies, such roles were unthinkable a generation
ago. Traditionally, the nunnery was the only haven for exceptional
women with intellectual or spiritual aspirations.
Abstinences
and privations do not come without suffering. We hold to the profane
world by all the fibres of our flesh; our senses attach us to
it; our life depends upon it...So we cannot detach ourselves from
it without doing violence to our nature and without painfully
wounding our instincts...
Many nuns have told me that celibacy is a Karmic boon earned in
a previous lifetime. Such nuns believe they have accumulated enough
merit in prior lifetimes to have achieved a rebirth in which they
were able to become nuns. Karma provides a theodicy but allows room
for agency as well as every action is also a choice for which the
individual must bear ultimate responsibility. Adversity thus forges
individual determination rather than erodes it. While nuns may recognize
the hardships or (as Durkheim would have us believe ) the painful
wounding of their maternal instincts, they find compensation in
the Karmic philosophy which underlies their action. One nun, Lhaskyid,
when asked if she missed not having her own children, replied, "We
nuns are lucky; we are every child's mother. We do not rejoice or
grieve over only our own..."
THE
IMPOSSIBLE REFUSAL OF EXCHANGE
For
nuns, celibacy and renunciation are more about resistance than release,
more struggle than liberation. In Zangskar as elsewhere in the Tibetan
realm, nuns are domesticated by the social and cultural construction
of sexuality which places them subservient to both families and
monks. I propose that the subordinate roles of nuns rests upon a
deeper impossibility of allowing them to be equal to monks. A radical
egalitarianism between male and female celibates would threaten
the traditional and inviolable hierarchy of male over female. In
practice then, Buddhist monasticism maintains sexual difference
even at the expense of doctrine. If nuns were free to transcend
their sexuality, they would stand radically outside their society's
sex/gender system. Because monasticism is bound to the very roots
of the society upon which it depends, sexual hierarchy appears inevitable.
Women,
signs, commodities, and currency always pass from one man to another;
if it were otherwise, we are told, the social order would fall
back upon incestuous and exclusively endogamous ties that would
paralyze all commerce....But what if these commodities refused
to go the market ?...
Female celibacy may threaten the principles of kinship and exchange,
yet the negation of sex and gender roles runs more directly counter
to these principles. A nun's refusal of marriage and motherhood
opposes the principles of alliance and reciprocity. While nuns are
permitted to relinquish responsibilities to forgone husbands, in-laws,
and children, they cannot deny their roles as daughters and sisters.
In the end, nuns cannot avoid the symbolic exchange for merit and
the promise of filial service. She may elude the patriarchal economy
of desire but her refusal to be exchanged cannot be fulfilled. Nuns
can attempt but cannot maintain the refusal to be exchanged. Monks
are not casual bystanders but operate the exchange of women between
the secular and sacred realms. As noted, monks retain the sole authority
to admit, admonish, advance, or expel nuns within their own order.
The monk's order upholds the principle of exchange as they receive
one more dutiful servant whose spirituality does not challenge but
sustains their fundamental ritual and economic superiority. Although
Buddhist doctrine preaches an ultimate escape from the dualism of
sex and gender, this message is quite gender specific. Nevertheless,
when nuns cease to be simply at the mercy of others' desires, the
utopian ideals of Buddhist celibacy mey be fulfilled.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Foremost,
I thank many Zangskari nuns for their infinite patience, compassion,
and hospitality over the past years. Heartfelt thanks to M. Aris,
S. Bell, D. Donahue, H. Havnevik, A. Kleinman, S. Levine, R. Norman,
E. Sobo, J. Willis, and N. Yalman for comments on earlier drafts.
The Jacob Javits Foundation, Mellon Foundation, and the Harvard
Department of Anthropology funded my research between 1991 and
1997.
*Gutschow,
Kim 2001. The Women Who Refuse to be Exchanged: Nuns in Zangskar,
Northwest India. In Celibacy, Culture, and Society: The Anthropology
of Sexual Abstinence. Elisa Sobo and Sandra Bell, Eds. Madison:
University of Wisconsin Press. Pp. 47-64.
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